7 Year Itch

7 year itch

The wife's left me - she's off to the motherland for some cool air and quiet times!

I would never have thought that I would find myself in the position of Tom Ewell's character in 7 Year Itch - one of my favourite movies but here I am. For those not familiar with the movie, Tom is left alone in their apartment in a sweltering hot Manhattan during August while his wife goes to spend the summer in the country.
Richard Sherman, Ewell's character has been married for 7 years and finds himself tormented and struggling to maintain his fidelity as a voluptous young lady - Marilyn Monroe - moves into the apartment upstairs.

Now, my wife and I have only been married for 5 - let's see how I get on. I'm trying to see this time apart as a positive one, I think I'm going to miss her, but at the same time, it might be a moment to embrace my latent heterosexuality. Always having to play the husband can be somewhat tiresome. So, as Sherman finds his Monroe in his very building, I should assume my very own male version of Monroe lies within the 4 walls of Do-Forno Hughes Heights. Are there any straight men in this building? Let's see - off to the lift to find out...

Renewing our vows

Such is the success of our marriage at the moment, that we have decided to get married again!!

With our original wedding stylists on the other side of the Atlantic, we consulted our good friend, Paul Wedding Dress, to help find our frocks at his Macy’s bridal suite.

Assisted by 76 yr old Sylvia, after much primping and preening in the 360° mirrored display boxes, it seems that even the “World’s Largest Store” had nothing good enough for us. We headed off into the night and settled for beers and curry instead. Much more like it.

“There’s nothing to do in this city…”

Saturday afternoon in the city that never sleeps, and that’s exactly what we want to do. It’s so boring here. To whittle away a few hours, we stopped off at a Chinatown salon for a quick wash and blow-dry. $11 each. A snip, one might say.

Alcohol-Dependence Day 4th July - Our first celebration as patriotic yanks

4pm: Champagne-fuelled picnic in Brooklyn (1 bottle each)
7pm: Swift tipple whilst switching flippers for heels
8pm: Rooftop fireworks party #1, overlooking the Hudson
11pm: Rooftop party #2 – Terry gets left behind
Midnight: Regrouped poolside at Soho House (miraculously, we both stayed dry, ie. we didn’t fall in)
4am: Vintage champagne and large G&Ts at a West Village penthouse
Following this, we must’ve lost interest – no memories available…

Making Headlines

Running late for our lunch date with Barack and Michelle, we hadn’t the time to stick around for our front-page photoshoot for the capital’s favourite broadsheet. Without further ado, we settled for a quick pose atop their signpost

Up Shit Creek

June was getting a bit agitated at a suburban Maryland party – not enough action - so she lured me down to the waterside, me thinking she just wanted a romantic spot to get a bit jiggy with it. Not so…

She had her eyes firmly lusting after the speedboats roaring around the harbour. Sure enough, within minutes we had been dragged aboard by a gaggle of wasted seafaring loons (skipper pictured), and essentially TerryandJunenapped to god knows where, with said locals stumbling around trying to point out the sights on their beloved “creek”.

The missus loved it – I could barely understand them. We did eventually get dumped on dry land and stumbled around for a fair while trying to find the identikit picket fenced porch with yank flags from where we’d started.

Wacko Jacko Moonwalk Hunt

26th June 2009: A day after the untimely death of the King of Pop, I was driving down the Westside Highway when the wireless announced that in 30 minutes’ time, there was to be a mass-memorial-Moonwalk in Times Square. Dashing home, I grabbed Terry and, living just streets away from the action, head up to join in the fun, en route to our romantic weekend in Maryland. After standing around awkwardly with the other one thousand punters, all staring blankly at an empty fenced off zone, the local constabulary made us stop before we'd got enough.

Setting Up Home

So, fresh from Berlin and the Upper West Side respectively, Terry and June moved in to the new downtown Manhattan Do Forno-Hughes pad on June 18th, assisted by the ever-able Chrissie B and our endless stream of enthusiastic doormen, Carlos, Benoit, Jorges, Richard, Sam and Joe. 27 packing boxes later and with a new set of Zabar's silverware, we are ready to embark on the city that never sleeps. Should fit us like a glove.

Terry and June Do Forno-Hughes: an introduction

For those readers unfortunate enough not to have been in attendance at our 2005 Portuguese nuptials, we thought it apt to set the scene of a very happy marriage.
Terry & June met in 1995, in the shadow of Aberdeen's finest granite. After many years of courtship, and with an intuitive suspicion that no-one else would have them, the advent of their late 20's persuaded them that to settle together was their best bet. Four years into the marriage, they put their relationship successes down to the fact that they have never co-habited. Until now....